Sleep, glorious sleep...

Do you have a tricky sleeper?

Is bedtime a battle?

Does your child resist naps?

Do they wake multiple times during the night and struggle to settle again?

If any of this sounds familiar, this post is for you.

Let’s start at the beginning — with sleep associations.

What are sleep associations?

Sleep associations are the things your child relies on to fall asleep.

We all have them — adults included.

For example, as adults we might need:

•       A pillow and duvet

•       Background noise, music or the TV

•       A specific sleeping position

Now imagine waking in the night and finding your pillow and duvet gone. Chances are, you’d struggle to get back to sleep. I know I would!

The same applies to children.

If your child falls asleep by:

•       Being breastfed or bottle-fed

•       Being rocked, cuddled or patted

•       Using a dummy

•       Having a parent lie next to them

…then when they naturally stir during the night (which is completely normal), they may need that same support to fall back asleep.

Why night wakings happen

Children, like adults, wake briefly between sleep cycles. The difference is whether they can self-settle back to sleep.

If your child needs a specific sleep association to fall asleep at bedtime, they will often need that same association every time they wake overnight.

This can lead to multiple night wakings and leaving everyone exhausted.

Common sleep associations

Some common ones include:

•       Being rocked, cuddled or patted

•       Breastfeeding or bottle-feeding to sleep

•       Dummy use

•       Sleeping in a parent’s bed

•       Falling asleep in the car or pushchair

•       A parent lying next to them or sitting in their room

And here’s the important part…

If what you’re doing works for you and your family, there is absolutely no need to change it.

However, if you feel exhausted, overwhelmed or ready to make changes, gentle and supportive adjustments can help your child learn to settle themselves back to sleep.

Many families I work with 1:1 want their child to be able to self-settle during the night especially when night wakings are frequent and affecting parents, siblings and overall wellbeing.

A note on babies and night feeds

It’s important to say that for newborns and young babies, night waking for feeds is completely normal and necessary. They wake because they are hungry not because they need help settling.

Support looks different depending on your child’s age, development and individual needs.

Support is available

Helping a child develop independent sleep skills doesn’t mean leaving them unsupported. With the right guidance, changes can be made gently, responsively and in a way that feels right for your family.

A sleep consultant can support you step-by-step and yes, a full night’s sleep really can be within reach.